Until It Hurts

Several mornings ago, while I was driving in to school, one of the radio stations was doing a call-in show with a lawyer.  I think they call the guy Attorney Adam.  Some guy, a younger one, I presume, called in about a money situation.  His home had been broken into, and several electronic things were stolen:  his television, game system, and things like that.  He had gone to an unnamed big box store to get a new TV, but then he found one he liked better and decided to return the first one.  When he got home from that transaction, he took the crisp, new $100 bills out of his pocket....and found that he had been given $200 too much.  His question amounted to, "Aren't I justified in keeping this money?"  The corporation wouldn't be hurt by it, and he had just been robbed, so wasn't God, karma, or whatever just looking out for him? 

I was.....well, I was outraged.  Literally, I was driving along, alone, exclaiming to myself, "NO!  It's not your money, and it certainly isn't a gift!"  If anything, it seemed to me that it was a test, even if only for himself: would he do the right thing and return it, even if it was difficult to do?  Someone's job could even be resting on a mistake like that.  It's been a long, long time ago, but I can still remember that when I worked at McDonald's in college, our registers had to even out at the end of the shift or we'd get written up.  Surely the stakes must be a bit higher for hundreds of dollars, even in this exorbitant day and age. 

I was relieved that the attorney advised him to return the money.  One of the deejays even noted that if he did, he would feel better about it than if he kept the money.  I'm not sure they convinced the guy, though.

Maybe the season is what made this avaricious caller stand out in my mind so much.  I don't have to tell most of you this, because almost everyone who reads this is a teacher or has one in the near family, or has been one of my students.  But anyone in education can vouch that the Christmas season is one of the most rewarding and heartbreaking times of the year to spend with kids of any age.  High schoolers show their very best side during this time; even those with little extra for themselves want to help those who are younger.   My PACE Club kids have coordinated stockings for Head Start for the last two years, with most of the high school clubs contributing gifts to fill the stockings, and last year we went to the Laura Dester shelter in Tulsa to decorate the family visiting rooms for the holiday.  (They loved that so very much and wanted to repeat it, but it's a difficult thing to find time for at the end of the semester, especially when we lose a week to snow.)  LGHS Student Council has done Angel Tree giving for kids at the elementary level for at least ten years now---around 30 kids every year.   Teachers and students both contribute to that. 

If I weren't afraid of breaking some confidences or bringing attention to people who don't want it, I could tell you a number of stories about administrators, teachers, and/or staff who took it upon themselves to quietly provide for kids or whole families at Christmastime.  It's the spirit of what brings people to the field of education that leaves their hearts open at this time of year: the certain knowledge that the only thing keeping the world afloat sometimes is how much we are willing to sacrifice of ourselves for others.  It's no coincidence that "humanity" refers to both the people and how the people treat each other. 

Of course, that sacrifice means that, sometimes, everyone extends themselves too far.  What is too much; what is just enough; how do we know when to quit?   Everyone I know seems to live by an unspoken principle:  You give till it hurts.  You do not what you have to do, but what you can't live without NOT doing.  A few years ago, right before our Christmas break, one of our staff members had her home broken into, and all her Christmas presents for her children and grandchildren were stolen, as well as her own items, such as her TV.  There was no way she could afford to replace them.  But she did...because between the students and her co-workers, all the money she needed was donated within a few hours to restore her family's Christmas.  Not one of us could live with the idea of that sweet lady, one of the kindest I've ever worked with, not having what she needed for that precious time with family. 

Here's my final point on the matter, the one I so wish I could make to that standards-challenged radio caller.  I felt a bit overwhelmed with my obligations this year.  I didn't do Secret Santa with my co-workers at school because I was a little worried about paying the piper when that credit card statement rolls through in January.  We don't do a lot of gifts in my family anymore, only for the parents and the kids, but I pushed it a bit in other areas.  I was in no danger of being in financial trouble, just a little stretched.  Then Wednesday morning, we were called in for a faculty meeting.  One of our school board members came and spoke to how much they appreciated our hard work this year, and that they understood the sacrifices we've all made during the financial cuts the state has made over the last several years---no supply money and such.  But they had managed to work out a bonus for everyone:  not a lot, just $200, but it was something.   To me, it was enough. 

I don't think anyone there was in danger of breaking down in tears over $200----but how I wished I could tell that young man:  This is how God looks out for you, sir.  Give until it hurts, and it will be given back to you in greater measure than you would ever expect.